Jesus H Christ was one of the most influential beings of all time, with books, films, songs and other stuff like musicals all featuring him. That said, little is known about him. A careful analysis of the bible reveals some minor details – he was born in a shed and was regaled with gold, frankenstein and Grrrr. Later, we know he was nailed to a cross in Judea. Reading between the lines, we have come to the inescapable conclusion that Jesus must have been a cat. (Why else would he have been born in a shed?) Below is an artist’s impression of what he is thought to have looked like.